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    • CommentAuthorsara
    • CommentTimeJan 1st, 2010 7:44pm (Jan 1st 2010) edited
     
    I have been asked if i would be intersted in moving, to help My Aunty out, She has a big house in , Tallangatta,Victoria middle no where, she need help. She has family but they dont help, It would mean giving up everything, But changing everyones life for good, would you do it?
    • CommentAuthornanny north
    • CommentTimeJan 1st, 2010 8:14pm (Jan 1st 2010)
     
    Nothing like a new adventure Sara.....but loads of things to think about first. How well do you know this aunty? Do you know the reasons the rest of her family won't help her? Do you want to change the life style you have ? Get a sheet of paper fold it in half, write good reasons to do it one side and bad reasons on the other side see what out weighs the other, Then get Hubby and Charlotte to do the same. Think very very carefully before you do anything remember you are in charge of your own lives at the moment and caring for family can be a very cruel job no matter how much you love them they soon take your life over.
    •  
      CommentAuthorKateb
    • CommentTimeJan 1st, 2010 9:00pm (Jan 1st 2010)
     
    NN is right Sara, don't make any hasty decisions. You also have to think of the practicalities - schools, health insurance, weather, condition of the house (is it falling down around her ears?!), and also what's in it for you? (that is, if she dies are her family that currently want nothing to do with her going to evict you and sell the house and leave you destitute?) It may seem harsh to say that outloud but you have to consider it. Is she just after a cheap housemaid rather than pay for homecare?

    There are not the same social support systems like we have here. What about work for your hubby? (Would you need work permits?) Will Charlotte want to leave her friends?

    If you think it all through and it seems like a good idea, could you go for 6 months to try it out? Do you own your own home? You could rent it out short term maybe? Or even go with Arthur and Dennis and Charlotte and hubby join you later?
    • CommentAuthorLynnW
    • CommentTimeJan 1st, 2010 10:54pm (Jan 1st 2010)
     
    Sara...I wouldn't do it for all the tea in China. Been there..Done that.. got the tee-shirt..the stress can kill you.
    •  
      CommentAuthorchief chicken
    • CommentTimeJan 2nd, 2010 6:00pm (Jan 2nd 2010) edited
     
    Yes, look carefully at Lynn and Init's experiences of looking after an infirm person, Sara. Mind you, it's near Trev and Trev's mum! Health insurance would need to be looked into, especially if Dennis has a few breathing problems. At least you've got Trev & Trev's mum to ask about things.
    But to answer your question....never in a million years!
    • CommentAuthorsara
    • CommentTimeJan 2nd, 2010 11:50pm (Jan 2nd 2010)
     
    The house is a mega big beautiful farm house in the middle no where, My hubby is a welder by trade, yes there calling out for them.Charlotte wants to go and would give up everything. no we rent our home we was just going to buy. So we could do the attic up for charlotte as my house is very small, big backgarden but small inside.So the idea of living in a big house sounds nice.
    Her husband my Uncle died about 4years ago, he was knocked off his moto bike and died.She does have 5children but they have all left and have houses and lives of there own, some of them are famers one of them has over 300cow.
    Yes health insurance,, do you have to pay when you go to hospital,? at the moment i dont know much, Ive just been asked if i would like to go. I dont have much family, As some of you know i havent seen my mum in 17 years.nasty childhood, So the fact that my Aunty has said she would be the mum ive never had and the gran my kids would love would be nice. But ive never really had one so im not missing anything. I do have a nana who i see about twice a year, Then there is old man ken who i look after. so there are thinks to think about, Charlotte is going to be in her last year in September so we would have to wait atleast 2years. And what about my childrens trust fund! do they have banks... sound funny but i know nothing about the place only that kylie came from there and its hot.
    So many things to think about, If i had the money i would go over for a month or two, but hubby said he wouldnt come back he hate england, he said its domed!! And that there is going to be no nhs soon nor any penshions,he said we should get out while we can..
    •  
      CommentAuthorchief chicken
    • CommentTimeJan 3rd, 2010 3:00pm (Jan 3rd 2010)
     
    England's no worse than anywhere else at the moment; I get cross with all this negativity. Our NHS is the envy of the world, and if they got rid of a lot of the managerial staff and replaced them with nursing staff we'd be even better off. I know lots of people who have emigrated and then come back...so it must be better here than France, Spain, America and Australia, or all those people wouldn't have come home!:)
    • CommentAuthornanny north
    • CommentTimeJan 3rd, 2010 4:45pm (Jan 3rd 2010)
     
    I agree with CC, and could add even more then that, but am probably best off keeping my opinions to myself.:001_huh:
    •  
      CommentAuthorchief chicken
    • CommentTimeJan 3rd, 2010 6:37pm (Jan 3rd 2010)
     
    No, c'mon up, NN - plenty of room up here on the soapbox! :rolling:
    •  
      CommentAuthorKateb
    • CommentTimeJan 3rd, 2010 8:39pm (Jan 3rd 2010)
     
    Hey! The NHS can't run on nurses alone you know!:computer: ;)

    I would assume you have to be there for a certain amount of time to qualify for free med care (I think they have something similar to the NHS for the 'natives'!) It worries me that she seems to be playing on your desire to have a mother/grandmother figure. What are her care needs?
    •  
      CommentAuthorchief chicken
    • CommentTimeJan 4th, 2010 3:07pm (Jan 4th 2010)
     
    Posted By: KatebHey! The NHS can't run on nurses alone you know

    I know...that's why I said 'a lot of managers' - not all of 'em!
    •  
      CommentAuthorKateb
    • CommentTimeJan 4th, 2010 9:27pm (Jan 4th 2010)
     
    Big part of the problem is that a lot of nurses go into the profession to become managers, not because they want to care for the sick.

    Have you thought of going into nursing Sara? I know you're a carer now - just the sort of person the NHS needs. The Aussies are always happy to give UK trained nurses jobs, as are the Americans.
    •  
      CommentAuthorchief chicken
    • CommentTimeJan 5th, 2010 6:31pm (Jan 5th 2010)
     
    Trouble is, there's a lot of essay writing now, isn't there? That's why my friend Janet told 'em to stick it in the end; she passed everything except the essay bit - and if the NHS can afford to lose a good nurse for the sake of an essay she'll never need to use, then they can't be that badly off.
    •  
      CommentAuthorKateb
    • CommentTimeJan 5th, 2010 9:17pm (Jan 5th 2010)
     
    We were talking about the old nursing structure today, when they used to have SENs (State Enrolled Nurses) and SRNs (State Registered Nurses). The SRNs were more qualified academically, and therefore would have the managerial responsibility, whereas the SENs were the real 'carers' that would spend time with patients, tend to their needs, all the things the general public imagine a nurse to be, and that its a shame they don't bring it back.
    •  
      CommentAuthorchief chicken
    • CommentTimeJan 5th, 2010 9:23pm (Jan 5th 2010)
     
    Yes, Janet was furious. I think the NHS lost out there.
    • CommentAuthorsara
    • CommentTimeJan 12th, 2010 7:15pm (Jan 12th 2010)
     
    Have you thought of going into nursing Sara? I know you're a carer now Kate yes i have worked in the hospital and i didnt like the way the nurse treated people, They where rude and hurtful, I was told to hand out the meals, which i did, One old man asked me to cut up his food as he couldnt do it, I was told to just leave his dish on the tray and go and do another job. He couldnt even reach his tray. They was an oldman who i was told had hours to live, I had to go and help change his csheets and his clothing. The nurse i worked with was so nasty to this man, He said that i shouldnt be concerned as he was deaf and blind and would be dead soon. Imsorry but i couldnt take it. I stayed in that foom strocking that mans arm for about 10mins, i felt so sorry for him,.
    Then there was an old lady who was crying because her pad down belowe was hurting her, the nurse she was talking to told her to shut up moaning and that she shouldnt realy be in hospital anyway./ She walked away leaving her still hurting, I asked her if i could help, all the lady wante was a fresh pad. The nurse told me that they had no room for her at the old peoples home, so she had to stay on the ward. So no i will not work art the hospital again, I was coming home crying to my family,
    I really dont know what to do, So may things to think about i cant sleep.....
    •  
      CommentAuthorchief chicken
    • CommentTimeJan 12th, 2010 7:19pm (Jan 12th 2010)
     
    You would make an ecxellent ladies' companion, Sara, you're very compassionate. As long as you know that the old lady won't turn out to be an old harridan!
    • CommentAuthorsara
    • CommentTimeJan 12th, 2010 7:26pm (Jan 12th 2010)
     
    old harridan! Whats that mean..?
    •  
      CommentAuthorchief chicken
    • CommentTimeJan 12th, 2010 7:28pm (Jan 12th 2010)
     
    Miserable old moo, and bossy with it!
    • CommentAuthorsara
    • CommentTimeJan 12th, 2010 7:35pm (Jan 12th 2010)
     
    O you mean like my hubby gets sometimes. O im used to that.. I just go shopping
    •  
      CommentAuthorchief chicken
    • CommentTimeJan 12th, 2010 7:39pm (Jan 12th 2010)
     
    ...and now you've got wonga to spend when you go!
    • CommentAuthorsara
    • CommentTimeJan 12th, 2010 7:46pm (Jan 12th 2010)
     
    haha as if flites take all that
    •  
      CommentAuthorKateb
    • CommentTimeJan 12th, 2010 10:24pm (Jan 12th 2010)
     
    Working in that hospital must've been a terrible experience for you Sara. As you know I used to work in complaints and we would get that sort of thing regularly - which is why I get annoyed when the press hold them up as 'angels'. They are humans and sadly it seems the ones that work with the elderly are not very compassionate. But you could train to be a nurse and work privately, or as a district nurse - there are lots of options other than being on a ward. You have a lot going on in your life at the moment, but maybe in the future you could think about it.
    • CommentAuthorsara
    • CommentTimeJan 12th, 2010 10:58pm (Jan 12th 2010)
     
    I want to do something with my art, I love to Draw, And im very very good at it,My english writing is poo but im big headed about my art course i love doing it.
    I have made some money from it too..
    Yes children keep you busy, but i love busy, I get all sad and depressed when i have nothing to do.
    If anyone wants to see my art work, It's on my face book.. Sara Marks...
    •  
      CommentAuthorchief chicken
    • CommentTimeJan 13th, 2010 3:31pm (Jan 13th 2010)
     
    My friend gets paid to work in an old people's home doing art with them. That'd suit you down to the ground, Sara.
    • CommentAuthorsara
    • CommentTimeJan 13th, 2010 8:23pm (Jan 13th 2010)
     
    O my gosh, yes indeed, how she start that?
    •  
      CommentAuthorchief chicken
    • CommentTimeJan 13th, 2010 8:32pm (Jan 13th 2010)
     
    It sort of comes under occupational therapy - she does sort of ganes with them and takes them on outings and things too. i think she saw it advertised in the local papers ; she had no experience with elderly people but had done the same sort of thing with delinquent brats somewhere.
    • CommentAuthorsara
    • CommentTimeJan 19th, 2010 10:47pm (Jan 19th 2010)
     
    Well i think im going to my auntys for a hoilday. Just to see what its like, before we say anything..
    • CommentAuthornanny north
    • CommentTimeJan 20th, 2010 2:50am (Jan 20th 2010)
     
    Thats the best thing to do Sara.
    •  
      CommentAuthorKateb
    • CommentTimeJan 20th, 2010 9:48pm (Jan 20th 2010)
     
    That'll be a lovely holiday too I'm sure!
    • CommentAuthorsara
    • CommentTimeJan 23rd, 2010 7:06pm (Jan 23rd 2010)
     
    Just me and hubby the flites cost a lot..
    •  
      CommentAuthorchief chicken
    • CommentTimeJan 24th, 2010 3:43pm (Jan 24th 2010)
     
    Kennels for the kids? :D
    • CommentAuthorsara
    • CommentTimeJan 27th, 2010 6:24pm (Jan 27th 2010)
     
    :group-love::sleepout::kick:yes or if your offering for the week, they are good.... xx
    •  
      CommentAuthorchief chicken
    • CommentTimeJan 27th, 2010 10:23pm (Jan 27th 2010)
     
    No, I haven't got any spare hutches...:P :)
    • CommentAuthorsara
    • CommentTimeJan 28th, 2010 11:34am (Jan 28th 2010)
     
    This is my Aunty's housePhotobucket
    • CommentAuthorsara
    • CommentTimeJan 28th, 2010 11:36am (Jan 28th 2010)
     
    This is her road/drive
    Photobucket


    This is backgarden

    Photobucket
    • CommentAuthorollie in UK
    • CommentTimeJan 28th, 2010 2:24pm (Jan 28th 2010)
     
    Those birds are something else. Just the sort of thing I like but not capable of making now.
    • CommentAuthornanny north
    • CommentTimeJan 28th, 2010 4:09pm (Jan 28th 2010)
     
    It looks beautiful Sara. But still best you go on a holiday there first to check it all out.
    • CommentAuthorsara
    • CommentTimeJan 28th, 2010 6:37pm (Jan 28th 2010)
     
    Yes i am. Just got to find the right time, MEANT to be going back to work in March,


    I so DONT want to go back./ but someone said if i did then id have to pay all my maternaty money back,


    Is this right????
    • CommentAuthornanny north
    • CommentTimeJan 28th, 2010 7:29pm (Jan 28th 2010)
     
    I haven't a clue Sara, see what you can find out on line or go to citizens advice they should be able to tell you.
    •  
      CommentAuthorKateb
    • CommentTimeJan 28th, 2010 10:46pm (Jan 28th 2010)
     
    I'm not sure Sara, but think it would be some - not all. Have a look at this:

    http://www.direct.gov.uk/en/Parents/Moneyandworkentitlements/Parentalleaveandpay/DG_10029290

    and this:

    http://www.worksmart.org.uk/rights/do_i_have_to_repay_my_maternity

    Its down to individual companies and at worst it would only be the money you'd had over the statutory pay. The gov.uk link has a link to see how much statutory you're entitled to.
    • CommentAuthorsara
    • CommentTimeFeb 1st, 2010 7:53pm (Feb 1st 2010)
     
    Statutory Maternity Pay (SMP) That's what im on, If i dont go back i have to pay £4.500 grand back!!!!!!!


    I should just go back n get sacked.......

    Going to find out how long i have to go back for, as im going to work to pay for child care. no point.. me not happy, going to have a big piece of full fat chocolate......................
    • CommentAuthorleevaux
    • CommentTimeFeb 1st, 2010 8:39pm (Feb 1st 2010)
     
    Hi Sara
    It looks fantastic very remote your aunty's house perfect for keeping chickens!!!!!!!!!:cheer:
    • CommentAuthorShobhna
    • CommentTimeFeb 2nd, 2010 9:05am (Feb 2nd 2010)
     
    Sara, It is a lovely opportunity for you and the family and it needs to be considered carefully.
    If it was me and the way things are for me, I'd maybe jump at the chance because all I'd need to do is take my Ma with me and set off.

    As CC says, it is hard work looking after an older person. The only thing I keep telling myself about that is that I too will get old one day (God willing) and I hope that I get similar care from someone...somewhere....like my Mum is getting from me now. It's not as if I have children that will care for me nor a husband that will care or mind how I fare. It is hard work and my Mum is still reasonably fit and healthy, if she was bed-bound, I'd still take care of her (she gave me life !!!) but it is a very big responsibility.


    I know for sure that it is a dilemma. I guess you need to be certain of finances when you get there. Living with your Aunt....does it mean that the property will be yours eventually?

    Many many questions. Worth a chat over a bottle of wine next month. :-) :-)
    •  
      CommentAuthorKateb
    • CommentTimeFeb 2nd, 2010 3:11pm (Feb 2nd 2010)
     
    SMP is from the Government Sara so if that's all you get you don't have to pay it back. Why not go and see the Citizens Advice Bureau - they can give you the right advice and about your options if you do have to pay anything back, or how long you'd have to return to work for so that you don't have to pay back. Don't take any notice of friends who've "had it happen to them". With maternity pay its all individual. Get some advice!
    • CommentAuthorsara
    • CommentTimeFeb 9th, 2010 7:45pm (Feb 9th 2010)
     
    Lee hello, yes Aunty allready has chickens,but she eats them,
    They said i would have to do that, no way i could look after animals and kill them and eat em.. no wqay..
    Yes im going to get info about returning to work or not..
    • CommentAuthorleevaux
    • CommentTimeFeb 10th, 2010 5:49pm (Feb 10th 2010)
     
    No Sara i Am with you on that one i know people who are quite happy to have there chickens as pets on one side and chickens for the table on the other i would love to be self sufficient but doing the deed i just could not do i am afraid.
    • CommentAuthorsara
    • CommentTimeFeb 11th, 2010 10:51pm (Feb 11th 2010)
     
    My cat Colin, when he brings me gifts half alive or half dead. I have to get hubby to sort them out, if they cant be fixed.

    Ican't even use a mouth trap, Nar no way i could kill something then eat it, even if it wasnt a pet.Its diffrent buying it, As its ready and looks like food.
    Ill just have to go veggie...
    •  
      CommentAuthorchief chicken
    • CommentTimeFeb 12th, 2010 6:34pm (Feb 12th 2010)
     
    That's why God made humane mousetraps, Sara! Splendid invention!
    • CommentAuthorGeorgie "P
    • CommentTimeFeb 17th, 2010 11:43am (Feb 17th 2010)
     
    I would go, but obiviosly keep contact with your other family. You could go back to the uk or where ever and see your frinds and family.:glasses: ps you may get a lovley tan! x
    • CommentAuthornanny north
    • CommentTimeFeb 17th, 2010 7:54pm (Feb 17th 2010)
     
    Ohh Georgie where have you appeared from ? You must be a newbie welcome to hen cam.
    • CommentAuthorollie in UK
    • CommentTimeFeb 17th, 2010 8:18pm (Feb 17th 2010)
     
    Georgie is my grand daughter - a large, as in tall, 12year old.
    • CommentAuthorTracyB
    • CommentTimeFeb 17th, 2010 8:20pm (Feb 17th 2010)
     
    Excellnet - we do like family participation.
    • CommentAuthornanny north
    • CommentTimeFeb 17th, 2010 8:23pm (Feb 17th 2010)
     
    Oh that is nice Ollie I hope she joins in all the fun with us.
    •  
      CommentAuthorKateb
    • CommentTimeFeb 17th, 2010 10:25pm (Feb 17th 2010)
     
    Hi Georgie, welcome to Hencam!
    • CommentAuthorsara
    • CommentTimeFeb 18th, 2010 2:13pm (Feb 18th 2010)
     
    Well i have spoken to my reald dad and my step and real sisters they all say go.
    SO IM going to book myself a short trip, to veiw the house, the schools and the area,ect. just got to sort this lot out now, make sure there ok for when i go.
    • CommentAuthornanny north
    • CommentTimeFeb 18th, 2010 6:12pm (Feb 18th 2010)
     
    you will have a lot on your hands getting ready for the trip Sara,
    • CommentAuthorTracyB
    • CommentTimeFeb 18th, 2010 8:11pm (Feb 18th 2010)
     
    Hi Georgie..... welcome.

    Sara a fact finding trip sounds liek a really good idea.
    • CommentAuthorTrevs Mum
    • CommentTimeFeb 19th, 2010 1:23am (Feb 19th 2010)
     
    Welcome Georgie, Ollie's grand daugher how nice.

    Sara glad you had such a great time catching up with family.

    I think it's a great idea for you to come out here on a fact finding mission.

    Let me know when, once you decide. I wish we could meet up, but its about 5 hours away and I dont think I could do the trip but if you decide to come down Geelong way for a look that would be fabulous.
    Would you bring the boys or just by yourself?
    • CommentAuthorGeorgie:)
    • CommentTimeFeb 19th, 2010 11:56am (Feb 19th 2010)
     
    Hello thanks for all of the welcoms, and i have a new user account the other one said it was cancelled :cursing: xx
    • CommentAuthorsara
    • CommentTimeFeb 19th, 2010 6:50pm (Feb 19th 2010)
     
    Trev's mum, yes be nice to meet a few more people over there.
    If i go for the short trip, i'll go alone as its costly on the flites.
    • CommentAuthorsara
    • CommentTimeMar 9th, 2010 10:35pm (Mar 9th 2010)
     
    flites £300 adult Then £250tax on top of that,l mean 250tax what for, even for arthur who is 4 his flite is 185 then tax 250, the baby no tax, but its an extra 750in tax, someone explain that to me?